Returning to the surface

Remember the first time you jumped into the deep end of the swimming pool? All the sound instantly disappears, the water rushes in, and you are instantly wondering, "How far down did I go?"

If you are like me in any way, panic started clawing at the back of your throat, forcing you to wonder when the next breath of air would be coming. And again, if we share common reactions, your next move was to flail desperately, seeking a straight-line trajectory to return to the surface to get that all-too-familiar, and now deeply sought-after gulp of air.

But what if, having been thrown into the deep end several times before, you learned that we are capable of containing our breath, emotions, and fears in such times, and instead of scrambling for the surface, pausing even for a moment, un-clenching your jam-shut eyes, and...

Anyone who has snorkeled (that is a weird verb... snorkeled...hmm...) will smile, knowing that in order to enjoy the underwater world, you have to go through these experiences. And you will never know what is under the surface until you are past this sensation. So much of life is actually under the surface.

Not to belabor this metaphor indefinitely, let it simply be said that Jessica and I are sitting just beneath the surface, enjoying the deep end, and in no real hurry to return to the surface. It is an amazing season of life, and there is tremendous beauty and discovery going on right now.

Some things that we are working on, that might give you an idea of what the deep end looks like right now:

• Jessica is spending all day, every day, less than a block from where I work, devoting herself to Judah's growth and health.
• I am going back to the drawing board on my old songs and recomposing them to be more current, as well as starting some new material.
• We are going through a few books that are helping us think through the blind spots in our thinking, and are eager to share what we are finding.
• Weeknights and weekends are increasingly calm, giving us so much time to be be together.

We are so thankful for the deep end, and will always cherish this time in the future seasons that we are taken into.

Now odds are that I won't post on this blog again, but you never know. Things are different in the deep end.